Charger Blogger Shares the Importance of Choosing Mental Health Over Hustle as a College Student

Y’know, nobody really mentions how challenging life can be. It’s stressful. You yell at the people you love to leave you alone when, in reality, you just want to be seen. You make stupid decisions. You say stupid things. This is a natural part of life, and as much as it hurts sometimes, it’s very much real.

Hey, it’s your blogger. I know I’ve been a little AWOL lately and, uh, that’s due to a couple reasons. Primarily being, I haven’t been well.

At all.

I started this blog with the goal of being fully transparent to everyone who reads it. We all have good days, bad days, really bad days, and days that I can only classify as neutral. The last couple of weeks for me have been a really bad day on repeat.

For those who don’t know, I’m a full-time student. I also work for two companies as an EMT and, obviously, write as a blogger. Formerly, I was the Learning Assistant (LA) for A&P II.

Readers: “YOU QUIT?!”

Author, tired: “Yep. I quit.”

I know I just wrote a blog about how much I love(d) being a LA and that still holds true in a few ways. I love teaching, I enjoy anatomy a ton. I just— I just couldn’t make another passion into a job.

I allowed myself to walk away from something I loved that wasn’t serving me anymore.

Of course, it was a difficult thing to tell my professor, but I’d been sleeping maybe thirty hours a week. My internal self-talk is that of a rage-room of a very, very upset eight-year-old. Despite how much I loved doing it, I couldn’t bring myself to continue. My brain was upset. My health was declining in several ways. I was angry.

So, I quit. I quit to protect my health. This was a rather atypical move as a workaholic, but at the same time, I don’t regret it.

I think there’s so much that can be said about the hustle of east coast Americans. That’s not saying that people in other parts of the country (or world) don’t work hard, but I’ve found that the people over here are especially workaholic people.

Have we made the ability to work the reward?

Personally, I use work as an escape. I use it to just not feel my feelings, make some money, and to ignore whatever dumpster fire has erupted back into my life. Work is a coping mechanism for me. Working in EMS, you get adrenaline dumps, and I can only think about how that neurotransmitter plays into my decision to work or not, especially when I’m stressed out.

While I don’t condone this, I don’t believe I’m the only one who does it.

So, for the people who are overworked and whose contributions go unseen, I see you. I see you trying your best with what you’ve been given. You are a great problem-solver, and even if you don’t feel like it, you are loved, and the work you do matters. You matter, just by existing. Even if you can’t see that.

Mental health can be a rough one. We have Counseling & Psychological Services (CAPS) here on campus, and don’t ever feel as though you cannot seek our help or support.

With plenty of peace, love, and peanut butter,
Beatrice